Anger can be adaptive and help us set appropriate boundaries
but can also become maladaptive when it masks
other painful emotions!
Anger is a feeling that tells people that they need to protect themselves from harm.
Anger tells a person that something needs to change.
Anger can be protective and constructive, but it can also be destructive.
Ways that anger & rage masks other underlying painful/uncomfortable feelings:
A frightened parent may react with anger at a child who runs into the street, masking the fear.
A person who feels hurt when criticized or rejected can decide that the situation is unfair and conclude that what the other person did was wrong and get angry.
Anger momentarily erases guilt, depression, and feelings of unworthiness.
Rather than feel sad or disappointed, people get angry at something or someone else to obliterate the painful sensations and thoughts.
Rage often occurs in reference to and masks the shame of loss of self-esteem or
fear of a fragile self. People often feel shame when they are rejected or humiliated, because these are extremely painful emotions, and rage covers them.
(Greenberg, 2002)